Escaping the Comparison Trap: Making Peace with Social Media

There’s a pretty good chance you have social media, and with that comes the existence of social media influencers. This is a very broad category, and there are always more showing up in a variety of niches, whether it be entertainment, lifestyle, etc. While we enjoy watching them, some of their luxurious lifestyles and achievements can cause us to feel envy, and consequently a feeling of “being behind”.

I’ve seen so many posts across the Internet of people feeling “not good enough” or “behind”, heck, even I feel behind when I open LinkedIn and see someone my age create a million dollar app within 2 days. While this problem isn’t new, it has been propelled by social media, and today I want to bring you some peace and bring up some points that are easy to forget in moments of comparison and pressure.

A very important point I like to bring up is that what you see online is typically NEVER the full story. For example, you see someone with a good physique online flexing in a mirror (arbitrary example, it just happens to be on my page since I like gym content). This type of post can make it easy for you to look at yourself and feel less than. However, what’s crucial to remember here is there’s a good chance that person was once in your shoes.

People don’t post their progress to reaching the goal, because quite frankly, it’s not attractive. No one wants to see the hard work on the Internet. Everyone is attracted to the flashy things, the “shiny objects”. People know that if they just post the end result, they’ll get more views and likes, and that makes sense, but you never see the full picture. The Internet isn’t really known for transparency anyway!

What I’m trying to say is this: don’t compare your progress/starting point to someone’s result. This is a very disproportionate viewpoint and will make you feel worse, when in reality it’s not a comparison you should be making at all. Be kinder to yourself, you can get there too, but don’t convince yourself you can’t when you haven’t even started/given yourself time.

Another angle of this issue is the idea that people do things for the Internet, but it doesn’t quite match reality. I saw a video recently of a man walking in a street, stopping by a trashcan, taking a Don Julio bottle out of the trash can, taking a selfie with it, and then leaving it there and walking away. All that for a photo to post online.

The things you see online COULD be true, but you should always hold some level of skepticism. There are a few people I know of who flaunt luxurious lifestyles online, when in reality a lot of it is untrue. One guy posted a really cool video on his story of Dubai, and it actually turned out to be someone else’s video he took from TikTok. He was actually in Dubai, but wasn’t doing anything in the video.

A small variation of this problem falls into body image. There are a lot of jacked guys on the Internet and ladies with desirable bodies, but a very large chunk of gym influencers use steroids and many female influencers get body-altering surgeries. I’m not saying they all do, but I’m reminding you to not compare yourself to things that weren’t even naturally possible in the first place.

Sorry for all the gym/body stuff, I’m a pretty big consumer of gym content!

The Internet is full of deceit. So, before you begin to beat yourself up, you should take into account that what you’re seeing may not even be real, especially with the rise of AI.

As a quick recap, these are some things you should do to really improve your mental health when scrolling: 1. Understand timelines, people work to get results, you can’t compare a millionaire to a baby. 2. Not everything on the Internet is even real or correct in reality, so don’t destroy your own mental health over something that doesn’t exist. 3. Remember that some things are not possible, at least not without some hidden extreme factor.

You don’t necessarily need to get rid of social media for better mental health. While it can help quite a bit, it can be a tough alternative. Instead, try conscious scrolling, it can make a world of difference without having to sacrifice the social factor.

If you’d like to reach out or send an email, I’d be more than happy to chat!

Email: [email protected]

Stay happy and keep smiling!